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12/09/2006 

The Power of Stupidity is All Around Us

I'm really fucked from inside! What annoys me terribly is the fact of knowing it's because of you and not a feeling generated solely by an act of free will. I hate to be touched by the ignorant and blind fate of your ego. The stupidity of your attacks against me seem so out-of-place and irrational. I look at you and you seem an alien trying to communicate without being able to breath or articulate something tangible.
What is all that spectacle for? Trying to convince me of your own dilema? Baby, if you want some help just ask for it, don't go screwing with my head meanwhile! I'm here to help, but only if you want to be helped...

I hate all these crazy paranoias and manias! You are a seriously fucked up creature and I'm sick and tired of fucked up creatures around me!
I make a promise right here right now: If this relationship won't work I will not to waste one more second of my life in building something valuable and constructive with another person again. Really. It is too much of an effort so I'll just turn into a fuckin' dandy and live my life as it was written by my imagination in the first place.
Know what? I'm already a serious case to handle, maybe you should try to work your scheme out before you fuck with mine and ultimately fuck everything around us. If this is what happens when one is more stressed out or occupied trying to be free from routine, cars and annoying routine, I wonder how the fuck is your reaction when something REALLY serious or bad happens?
What the hell is wrong? What the fuck have I done to constantly have to deal with crazy people? Am I on a sitcom and no-one told me?

I can only elaborate on two answers for this crappy feeling: 1. I am a control-freaked person who is working hard on is own-development as a human-being and building a structure whereon to work is issues and expand into something bigger than life and therefore I'm way further than most people I know; 2. Everybody around me is seriously dettached from what is good or bad, or lack of time or an investment....

Seriously, I can predict my life. I am gradually acquiring a very own technique that allows me to sneack into a possible future and see how it will turn out. Sometimes in the middle of this process something happens that acknowledges and confirms that I'm on the right track and I feel confident and move on. This is true, dear reader, you can seriously take a leading roll on what happens with you and this moment I am writing my own.
... What truly fucks with me is why wasting so much time, sweat and tears with useless talks and screams. Can you explain me?

The pattern is now destroyed. Thank you for reading.